It's well known that people are marrying later and later: I'd wager it wasn't only young things flocking to hardware stores to buy rope after the Fifty Shades Of Grey books and film came out. That's what triggered my covert interviews with the other male wedding guests. A survey recently revealed that 65 per cent of women over 50 are more sexually active than their mothers were, with almost half making love once a week more than many young couples with children. We hit the floor, he clearly believing himself to be the reincarnation of Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing. There has been an incredible shift since the Fifties when three-quarters of women and half of all men had tied the knot by their mids. This levels the playing field a bit more. Many young women, the men say, have serious body issues, are insecure and inexperienced. One single something maths teacher said being in a relationship with a young woman felt like 'entrapment' to him. They shouldn't give that up until they're ready and an age gap relationship can offer that. It hardly amounts to gallantry, but I suspect it's quite a common motive, and one we older women should be wary of. He wanted to take me to dinner back in London, to bed, to heaven. So uncomplicated sex and having fun without commitment are top of the list of the alluring qualities of older women. So I asked him how old he was and he replied Had it not occurred to him that one of the reasons some young women are getting hysterical is that they can't find men of their own age who want anything but meaningless sex? And the vast majority say sex is more fun as they get older because there is less pressure.
A man in his 30s who pursues a woman in her 50s is not usually looking for happy ever after with her. That's what triggered my covert interviews with the other male wedding guests. He wanted to take me to dinner back in London, to bed, to heaven. And despite my flailing efforts, he kept telling me what a great mover I was on the dancefloor. It wasn't so much an explanation as a stream of consciousness. So I asked him how old he was and he replied It got me thinking: What a terrible way to describe love, I said. It hardly amounts to gallantry, but I suspect it's quite a common motive, and one we older women should be wary of. Why is it, he asked, that they analyse every word, searching for hidden meanings, getting hysterical if he puts only one 'x' at the end of a message instead of three? His answer was frankly illuminating. It turns out, from my unscientific research, that it's not so much them opting for older women as opting out of dating younger ones. My passion for dancing is only equalled by my lack of ability. And the vast majority say sex is more fun as they get older because there is less pressure. Even I'm getting sick of the 'I'm old enough to be your mother' line, so I asked why on earth he would want to go out with a woman 18 years older. But he explained that it starts out fun, but before you know it they're dragging you into Baby Gap via the jeweller's, which these men just aren't ready for. Many young women, the men say, have serious body issues, are insecure and inexperienced. Many young men see the older woman as more of a finishing school than a lasting relationship. He was handsome, well- educated with a good career. While we're more likely to have a decent home, he's renting a pokey flat with mates from work or still at home with mum and dad. Men think young women see lovemaking merely as a weapon in the battle to make a partner commit. Yes, they're not thinking of the other person, but I don't think they set out to hurt them. So there must be something going on with young men these days. One single something maths teacher said being in a relationship with a young woman felt like 'entrapment' to him. You name it, he wanted it. But after a few years of sexual education - and being subsidised by someone with the financial wherewithal to pay for the lifestyle he aspires to - isn't it inevitable that the younger man will ultimately skidaddle when he finally feels like settling down? Peter Lloyd, author of Stand By Your Manhood - the politically incorrect bloke bible for marginalised modern men - says young men find older women 'liberating'.
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